The beat goes on...

Did you ever find a new path and have it feel so right that you start tap dancing in the kitchen?

I've been struggling with my career path for over 20 years. In my 20s, I was so convinced that I would be a Broadway star that I quit school, left my husband, sold my car and moved to New York City. I will never regret the move, but it (obviously) didn't have the outcome I expected.

I've never finished school, which has been a bugaboo for me for years. I've been to graduation ceremonies for my sister's kids and I always felt bummed out afterwards. I already struggle with my feelings of being a failure and that exacerbates it. Not that I'm not proud of my nieces and nephew. I couldn't be prouder. They're all very successful in their respective fields and are wonderful people to boot.

I thought about going back to finish my Bachelor's, but that would require retaking a bunch of classes in order to have enough local credits to graduate. I thought about changing up my degree and going after Fashion Design. I loved (and aced) the one class I took, but the time and coin required to do a full degree on a part-time basis was daunting. Also, there was no real guarantee that I'd end up as a designer. The competition is fierce and I'm twice as old as most of my classmates were.

My husband is set to retire within a few short years. Our household is going to go through a shift soon and it's going to require my picking up the financial slack. It has become increasingly clear that my dramatic and artistic pursuits aren't going to be reliable sources of income. On one hand this breaks my heart, because I enjoy entertaining and creating. I do realize that my style may not have a mainstream audience. I've made peace with that. I've also made peace with the fact that, no matter how talented I am, I may not be what the director is looking for. I'm kind of a niche girl. With a very narrow niche.

What's a girl to do? I don't want to work as a check out girl, even at Target or a craft store because I'll spend more than I make. I had that problem when I worked at Hancock's. That's part of the reason why I have such a large fabric stash. No lie. Employee discounts are a dangerous thing around me.

Well, Let me tell ya a li'l story: When I had my nervous breakdown, part of what brought it on was that I was trying to work in a creative job as costume builder. I was going to use the money I earned to start my design business, Tequila Diamonds. When that fell waaay through, blammo! I had a nervous breakdown. What I needed was a trade.

Now, the notion of massage therapy has been ruminating since high school when we gave each other backrubs in acting class. I was just more focused on the acting. The idea has come and gone over the years. Apparently I’m pretty good at giving massages as many friends have suggested that I do it for a living. It recently came to the fore when my mom gave me a salon gift certificate for the express purpose of getting a massage and the salon didn’t have a therapist on the payroll when I called for the appointment. I thought, “I could do that. I should do that.”

I found a local massage therapy school that not only trains you to work at a spa or salon, but also more clinical aspects of transformative healing. They not only teach Eastern forms, but Western as well, which is more of what I'm interested in, but I can get a broader selection of tools to use and be more prepared for the job market as a result. The best part? They only teach massage therapies. I won't have to take anything not related to being the best therapist I can be. Their application process is rigorous. They aren't just looking for the most students (and their money) like some schools I could mention but won't, they're looking for the right students. I have a couple more steps to get in the door, but so far, things are looking up.

I'm not going to do any acting during this 20 month period of studying, except maybe some short, special appearance gigs. I'm still going to work on my art projects in my free time. There are times when I simply must create. I'm going to continue blogging and field tripping.

But I have to say, as I was researching schools for this path, the site for CenterPoint stood out to me. Everything was up front and honest. When I called, I received a return call within minutes and the follow up was incredibly professional and thorough. I also discovered that there was quite a spectrum of opportunities beyond the salon. In addition, I think I'll receive a host of therapeutic benefits from doing something that really interests me and helps others.

Did I finally find that elusive career? I feel I have. I've been tap dancing in the kitchen for the last few days.

So, Flowerpots, did you find your path yet? Did you settle for your career or did you settle into it? I'll just leave that here for you to ruminate upon...