Carry On, My Wayward Sewn...

There'll be peace when I am done!

At least that's the hope. I have been trying to use up my current stash of fabrics. I have a tendency to say "Oh, but I need more. I don't have any coordinating fabrics." Yeah. That happens a lot. In fact, today I got a package from eQuilter.com, one of my favorite websites for fabric shopping. I can't say enough about them. I've never had to return anything, so I don't know how that works, but I always get my order within 3 days.

Here's why I "had" to order from them: at the Mill End GOOB sale I found an incredible Asian print and bought a couple of yards. It has eagles, clouds and drums on it, the purple background is the most beautiful shade. I haven't a thing to coordinate with it. I looked. So I found a few things on eQuilter. Only one of them isn't a good match, but it's a lovely, only-slightly-Asian-looking print, so I'm sure I'll find something with which to use it. I may not use all of that which I purchased for the quilt I plan on making, so there's that, too.

I mentioned earlier about taking some fabrics with which I had planned on making a sundress and making a baby quilt instead. Here's the quilt top:

I still had quite a bit of the fabric left, though, so I made panels of different widths to make a skirt. I didn't know quite how to give it a waist, however. I just couldn't make up my mind. Did I want to gather it? Put in a zipper and a waistband, or do an elastic or drawstring?

Then, real quick-like, before I took all 6 of my bags of stuff to the thrift store, I went back and found a waffle shirt I had thought about donating. I put a few pleats in the skirt at the seams and in the middle of the 4 larger panels, then I figured out where an empire waist would be on my shirt by putting it on my dress form and cutting it off at the desired length. I made the long sleeves half-length and left the edges unfinished. Now I have a dress, too!

It looks better on a human.

As you can see, I'm really a fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants kind of designer. Something has to speak to me. It doesn't even have to be all that loud, either. I will also listen to all of the options it has to give me. This is where a sistah gets into trouble. I end up with so many ideas (and the materials for them all) that I have a hard time getting around to them.

This is why I decided to really dig in and get my stash busted in 2014. Yeah, sometimes I'll have to buy some more stuff. That's because my ideas keep coming. A lot of creative people have this problem, I know I'm not alone in this. It can all get to be a bit overwhelming, too. At least I'm able to come up with alternatives if something just isn't working for me. Even if the "problem" item languishes in a closet for a while. Years, even.

Fortunately, there are times when I can actually think on my feet and change a project mid-oops. Like the issue with the Hell on Wheels project. I had worked so hard on putting together the Dresden blades that I couldn't just give up. I took several small breaks, don't get me wrong. I even worked on a few other projects while I thought about what could be done with Hell on Wheels.

If you step back, you can see that the lighter sections create a star pattern within the plate. I'm not gonna lie, it was mentally and emotionally draining. I made a second one with a different main color. Then I needed a nap.

At first I was just going to use the denim. Then I thought about adding the raw linen. I ended up liking the lightness of the linen better than the blue of the denim. The half plate is the second one I had made with a star. Somehow it got out of order when I set them aside (even though I know I clipped them together in order), so I changed my mind on the design in that aspect, as well. The rectangular blocks use the remaining blades and are trimmed to make them square. The denim became a doggie bed for my mom's dog when they visit.

The final quilt top. I decided to go with a modern wall hanging instead of a  full-sized throw. I'm much happier with it this way than I thought I would be. Another happy accident!

That reminds me, I took the Happy Accidents quilt to Nikol of Sewtropolis for the quilting. It should be done in about two weeks. Then I can bind it and take it to Rachel! 

Sadly, Sewtropolis is now only an online entity. I had been planning a field trip there. But at least Nikol's still quilting and teaching. I hope to get to one of her classes very soon.

Whoops! Another reminder. Because of the bad weather, I cancelled February's Friday Field Trip. I'm just going to move it to March rather than try to put together another day. Hopefully the weather will start cooperating. It has made my various somatic neurological issues very cranky, and by extension, I've been more than a bit cranky. What I wouldn't give for temperatures above zero degrees Fahrenheit!

Well, my flowerpots, jump into your stashes and crank out some stuff!

Flippin' Doodle Dots!

That's the minced curse my kids say when something isn't going right, and I have had a week in which I may rightly use that phrase.

I was working on a Dresden Plate quilt. I put together the plate blades very carefully (just about did me head in!) so that when I got back to them, they would be in the right order. I got two of them done and the third one was half way complete when I noticed that it couldn't possibly be right. So now I have 1 1/2 Dresden Plates and a large Wagon Wheel and I have no idea how they got messed up. I had clipped them together in sewing order for the express purpose of not getting a headache!

Determined to make lemonade out of lemons, I took the remaining blades from the ferkachte plate plus my extras and stitched them together in a series of strips instead of a circle. I squared them off, trimming the angled edges and now I'm going to have a totally different quilt than I originally intended.

I had also purchased a hunk of denim at the Mill End GOOB sale that I planned on using as a background. Nope. Wrong shade of blue. On the other hand, I also got a few yards of linen in a strange, orangey shade of tan that works as a background. Huh. I had planned on making a jacket out of that, but I'm liking the look of it for this piece more and more.

I tried stitching the two background pieces together for a throw, but I'm just not getting a vibe from the whole thing. I take that back. I'm getting the wrong vibe from it like that. So, plan "C" is to take them apart and use the denim to make a doggie bed for my mom's arthritic dog when they come to visit (we have hard wood floors, not very comfy) and use all the pieces on the linen for a wall hanging.

Sometimes you really have to step back and reassess.

On another note, Sewtropolis, to which I had been planning to go for a field trip, has closed its doors, becoming a strictly online entity. The woman who ran it is still teaching and (thankfully) still quilting. I'm dropping off the quilt top and backing for my friend, Rachel's quilt with her today. I'm so relieved! I had driven by where Sewtropolis used to be the other day and couldn't find it, so I got on her website and all the pictures of the storefront and the address were missing from it. PANIC ATTACK! I went to her facebook page where I noticed someone had asked if she had closed the shop and, yes, it had closed in December. What a bummer. At least she still has an online presence and I can't begin to tell you how relieved I am that she's still quilting.

Flexibility is a trait that I feel doesn't come naturally to me. I get nervous when I get interrupted or realize that my plans aren't quite working. On the other hand, if someone else's plans get twisted, I'm very good at coming to the rescue and jury-rigging something for them. Like some people are really good at giving, but lousy at taking their own advice.

Going through my stash of fabrics has helped a great deal with flexibility. I've had so much fun with making quilt tops that I've changed my mind with some of the fabrics and pieced together more quilts instead of oh, say, a sundress. There are some things which really must be made into the garment I intended for them. They'd be just too great not to. On the other hand, I'm making peace with not (necessarily) going according to plan.

Your assignment: Let go of one old idea that you feel is holding you back. I'm not even going to make suggestions for this, since it's a very personal assignment. Let your mind be aware of the new-found freedom that gives you, even if you only do it for a day. See how that works out for you. The next day, try a different obstacle. Maybe something you thought was in your way of progress really wasn't and you can use it to your advantage instead?

It's okay to let go, my flowerpots. It really is.

Thrifty Thursday (Finally!)

I hate to post this, because, sadly, one of my favorite places to get fabric is going out of business. It was in the same neighborhood as my credit union, so it was a handy location (a little too handy, really). They always had good deals, unusual fabrics and probably the best collection of batiks this side of S.R. Harris (which will be one of our future field trips, BTW). Yes, Mill End Textiles is slowly liquidating their stock and boy, howdy! The deals are amazing!

If one of your neighborhood fabric meccas is going out of business, run, walk, drag your butt out in the cold blast of winter or hot steam of summer to get there! In the last three months while Mill End has been liquidating, I've hit the store about 5 times. I've purchased approximately $500.00 worth of fabric for about $175. I got thread at cost, cord and decorator trim for pennies and, in possibly the greatest tool coup ever, an Olfa compass rotary cutter for under $6. I went to a Jo Ann's immediately after to price the same cutter - $32.99!

What?! Yeah.

Of course, you run the risk of not getting enough of something and going back for more only to discover it's gone. That did happen to me. I eventually found the print I wanted in a different color combination that was just as cool as the one I had originally purchased, so I got that in enough for a dress. Yes, yes I did. Naturally I got stuff I don't NEED (like the thing-y to make fabric roses) but it was something I would only buy on ridiculous sale. Besides that, I'm hoping to use it in a segment for the blog, so it was worth it. I've been going through my fabrics at a rapid pace and felt the need to reward myself for a job well done. Granted, I'm only filling up the space I just emptied, but haven't we all done that at some point? (Please say yes. Please.)

Your assignment: Look around town, in the Sunday paper, on the net for places in your area closing up shop. Even if you've never been there before, check them out. You never know what treasures you'll find! Also, don't forget Field Trip Friday tomorrow at the Edina Jo Ann's at 10 am. If you plan on joining me, shoot me an email - totallytoots10@gmail.com!

What is "Perfect" anyway?

Dictionary.com defines the word "Perfect" thusly:

per·fect

 [adj., n. pur-fikt; v. per-fekt]

adjective

1.

conforming absolutely to the description or definition of an ideal type: a perfect sphere; a perfect gentleman.

2.

excellent or complete beyond practical or theoretical improvement: There is no perfect legal code. The proportions of this temple are almost perfect.

3.

exactly fitting the need in a certain situation or for a certain purpose: a perfect actor to play Mr. Micawber; a perfect saw for cutting out keyholes.

4.

entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings: a perfect apple; the perfect crime.

5.

accurate, exact, or correct in every detail: a perfect copy.

Yet, when I hear the word, I cringe. We put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect, or what we believe is the socially acceptable notion of perfect. All the plastic surgery in the world won't make a person "perfect" because they'll have the scars. There's no "Perfect time" to get married, change jobs, have children, but so many people wait for that elusive perfection, that they often miss out on something that, while not perfect, is certainly wonderful. How many criminals believed they had committed "the perfect crime" only to be convicted? How often has the "Perfect couple" split up? The "perfect" day gone awry?

I've put off a lot of things waiting for perfect; I've scrapped a ton of projects because they weren't perfect. I didn't want to start this blog (and certainly wouldn't do any demo videos!) until my studio was perfect. Guess what? It's still not ideal, but here I am, typing away, gathering ideas for videos that will eventually be filmed in my messy, cramped studio. I will say it's better than it was, but it's not... well, you know.

When I went to Dictionary.com for this, the daily word was echt. One I've never ever heard of, but one which couldn't have been more (dare I say it?) perfect for this entry.

echt

  \ ekht \   adjective; 

1.

real; authentic; genuine.

As I'm pecking away at things that aren't just the way I expected them to be, I've noticed one thing they all have in common. They're loaded with echt-ness. I mean, look at this thing! I don't know why it's not staying within the perimeters of my blog layout, but I don't know how to fix it, either. And there ya have it. Echt.

I pride myself on being echt. I encourage others to be as echt as they can be. Which is why the health issues of my last year were so disappointing. I suffered a nervous breakdown, followed by conversion disorder. I went to a bunch of specialists, had several MRIs, the first of which presented us with what would later (after being called a tumor, which is what took my father) be labeled as a lesion. I've probably had it all my life, but to be on the safe side, I went through all the testing for Multiple Sclerosis: EKG, EMG (which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy), Sleep EEG, spinal tap (and blood patch because it didn't heal and I was leaking spinal fluid). I kept hoping it was MS. Why would I want something so horrible? Because then it would mean it wasn't my fault. 

There had been a lot of things which led up to the breakdown, but I had been under stress before. Greater stress, actually. I'm a survivor of rape, I watched my father battle cancer, I've been stalked, I've had two children, one of whom has autism spectrum disorder, I've lived on my own in New York City in the 90s. You know, back before all the hipsters took over and it was still dangerous and cool. So I did not want to cop to the diagnosis of nervous breakdown. I'm too strong for that. Right?

The events leading up to it were numerous and offered a variety of stressors, some of which involved my perceived perfection. All I could think of when it finally got down to "you had a nervous breakdown" was, how could I have let all those outside influences take me over like that? I know I'm not perfect, so why was I so worried about it? Well, okay, the only thing I could come up with is that, deep down, we all wish we could be perfect. Our lives would be so much better, right? But I look around and I have shelter, enough to eat, a family who loves me. I even painted a family sign that hangs on our house that reads, "We may not have it all together, but together we have it all." I was disappointed in myself for not embracing my humanity, flaws and all.

What does this have to do with sewing or art? Well, as artists, I believe we all strive for perfection. Just as an athlete works out every day to get better and better, we study our craft(s) and work toward perfection. Sadly, we too often compare our work to that of others. I had a boyfriend when I lived in New York who was an artist. I liked the style of his work. It was bold and colorful. His best friend is one of these guys who can paint something and have it look like a photograph. Gene was always putting his work down because it didn't look like Phil's. I actually preferred the broad lines and astonishing surrealism of his work, but he couldn't see it or appreciate it for what it was: his echt.

When I was pregnant with my first son, I had grand notions of making my own maternity clothes. On my first trip out, I put the sleeves on backward and couldn't get the seams to lay flat, so I chucked it. I recently found it (almost 12 years later!) in a box in my studio. I really liked the fabric. It seemed a shame that it was just hidden in a box, wadded up in a ball of frustration. So I started to take it apart. Then I fussy cut a few of the motifs into 9 inch squares. I rummaged through my stash and found several fabrics which coordinated with the colors and theme of the print. This was born...

I'm not quite finished with it yet, but when I do git 'er done, I'll have something far more lasting than a maternity top. I may even be able to sell it, who knows?

The other day I went to one of my favorite fabric haunts, Mill End Textiles, which is sadly going out of business. However, it means there are hella good deals going on and I partook, oh, yes, I did. They're also selling the items they've had on display - quilts, pillows, clothing - all made by the people who work and shop there. I bought this pillow, partially because it looks so cool, partly because I wanted to snoop at it and figure out how it was made, but mostly because it was the perfect example of what I'm trying to say here. I'm not the only one who makes imperfect things that still look pretty darn cool.

Cool, right? Like you're looking through glass cubes.

But look at the red border. There's a good 1/8 inch sway in the seam.

Notice how the seams don't even come close to matching.

My first attempt at coordinating a pair of peacock panels to go with two others. I often work without a plan or pattern. I was running out of fabric and options. I did worry that it wouldn't look right.
I ended up changing the blue border into a feather border because I didn't want 2 blue borders next to each other,
which is what would've happened had I left it alone. So I changed it.  No big deal, no worries.  

...And it turned out to be more interesting. Not perfect, but echt and interesting. You also get a sneak peek of my messy studio.

The makers of echt Persian rugs (see what I did there?) always leave a mistake in the pattern. They believe that only God can be perfect and to try to out-shine God is a sin. I don't believe in the supernatural, but I do believe that the idea there is sound; humans aren't perfect, and we shouldn't try to be. We should do our best, certainly, but if things don't quite go the way we expected, we don't have to be so hard on ourselves. 

Here's your assignment: Go though your discarded projects, salvage what you can, recycle what you can. You may even decide it's not as bad as you thought. Of course there's the chance that you'll say, "Good gravy! What was I thinking?" and that's okay, too. If it's isn't echt to you, chuck it. Take it to the thrift store where it may be echt for someone else. Try to be as echt as you can be. Let me know how that turns out...

No, really. Let me know.